


Facebook Shenanigans

by RayvnAshes (IronScript)



Series: Just Another Day [1]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Drabble Collection, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Mix of, Multi, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Pre-Relationship, SO MUCH FLUFF, but not a lot, may be a bit of angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-07
Updated: 2018-03-07
Packaged: 2019-03-28 08:32:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13900257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IronScript/pseuds/RayvnAshes
Summary: What sorts of shenanigans could the characters of PJO and HOO get into if they had access to Facebook? Let's find out!Main pairing is definitely Solangelo, but the others are mentioned pretty often.(Note: these aren't necessarily connected stories but intended to be completely separate one-shots, so any contradictions between 'chapters' is because of that.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> Here's part of a series I wrote a long time ago on fanfiction.net on a now inactive account under the same pseudonym. This should be better organized that the original, since it was a drabble collection from the start and now I can link everything as a series while putting connected chapters together a lot more easily. The other drabbles (of which there are many) will eventually be added to this series, too.
> 
> Now for the obligatory disclaimer!
> 
> I am not Rick Riordan. I'm bending his characters and the world he created to my own will (yes, yes, I'm sure you're all very amused at the pun), but I'm nowhere near that level of awesome.
> 
> Now that that's out of the way, please enjoy!

**Percy Jackson** and **Annabeth Chase** are engaged!

**215 people like this**

Grover Underwood: It’s about time!

Nico di Angelo: Seriously, we were all wondering if you’d ever man up.

**358 people like this**

Percy Jackson: Hey! With two wars and being kidnapped for so long, I didn’t exactly have the opportunity!

Jason Grace: Dude, that was three years ago.

**Nico di Angelo, Will Solace, and Grover Underwood like this**

Percy Jackson: Wait…Nico, since when do you know how to use a computer?

Nico di Angelo: I take offense to that. I’m not dead, contrary to popular belief.

**Jason Grace, Will Solace, Annabeth Chase, and Leo Valdez like this**

* * *

**Nico di Angelo:** I’m really awkward when people compliment me. “Nice hair!” Me: Thanks, I grew it myself.

 **Will Solace:** Nice hair!

 **Nico di Angelo:** :P

 **Jason Grace:** Careful Nico, who knows what Will might do to that tongue of yours.

 **Nico di Angelo:** …

 **Will Solace:** …

 **Percy Jackson:** …

 **Piper McLean:** HAHAHA!!!

 **Nico di Angelo:** is off to murder a certain Son of Jupiter.

 **Hazel Levesque:** Will, if you hurt him, I will kill you. That being said…GET A MOVE ON!!!

**912 people like this**

**Will Solace:** ^_^

 **Nico di Angelo:** …You guys know this is still on my wall, right?

_**Reyna Avila Ramírez** _ **_-_ ** _**Arellano, Hazel Levesque, Piper McLean, and 219 others like this** _

* * *

_**Will Solace:** _ _I just got back from trying to teach Nico how to drive._

_**Annabeth Chase:** _ _How did that go?_

_**Will Solace:** _ _…no comment._

* * *

_**PM from Annabeth Chase to Nico di Angelo** _

_**Annabeth Chase:** _ _What happened? Will won’t tell me._

_**Nico di Angelo:** _ _Eh, I drove like a maniac. He freaked out and started praying to the gods, then basically glomped me in an attempt to get to the steering wheel. I laughed at him._

**Annabeth Chase:** But didn’t your zombie chauffer already teach you how to drive?

 **Nico di Angelo:** What’s your point?

 **Annabeth Chase:** …You just wanted Will to hug you, didn’t you?

 **Nico di Angelo:** Or I just like freaking people out.

 **Annabeth Chase:** Not buying it.  <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

 **Nico di Angelo:** What on earth are those?

 **Annabeth Chase:** Tilt your head.

 **Nico di Angelo:** …I hate you so much.

 **Annabeth Chase:** Sure you do. :D

 **Nico di Angelo:** Oh, just go fool around with Percy already!

 **Annabeth Chase:** *blushes and runs away*

 **Nico di Angelo:** Revenge is sweet.

* * *

**PM from Percy Jackson to Nico di Angelo**

**Percy Jackson:** I don’t know what you did, but thanks!

* * *

 **Nico di Angelo** is _traumatized._

 **Annabeth Chase:** HA!

 **Will Solace:** What’s up?

 **Nico di Angelo:** *mumbles* Note to self: jump in the river Lethe at the first opportunity.

 **Will Solace:** Didn’t you already do that? Seriously though, Annabeth, what did you do?

 **Nico di Angelo:** This time I’m choosing it myself.

 **Annabeth Chase:** Oh, nothing. He just found himself with way too much information.

 **Percy Jackson:** Um…sorry?

 **Nico di Angelo:** You people suck. SO. MUCH! I’m logging off.

 **Will Solace:** Wait, what did I do?

 **Piper McLean:** Nothing, he’s just intrigued by the thought of you sucking.

**1098 people like this**

**Jason Grace:** Pretty sure he didn’t mean it like that…

 **Annabeth Chase:** It was a Freudian slip.

**751 people like this**

**Frank Zhang:** He’s going to kill you all when he sees this, regardless of whether he meant it like that or not…

 **Will Solace:** Interesting.. _._ :P

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still not Rick Riordan. :P
> 
> Enjoy!

**Nico di Angelo** is never going to McDonald’s again.

 **Percy Jackson:** Why? You love that place?

 **Nico di Angelo:** I ended up punching the cashier and was banned. Whatever, if that’s what I’ll have to deal with I’ll go to Arby’s instead.

 **Frank Zhang:** Why did you punch the cashier?

 **Nico di Angelo:** He was taunting a little girl who was crying because she’d just been at her friend’s funeral.

 **Hazel Levesque:** WHAT?!

 **Clarisse la Rue:** Go Death Breath!

 **Will Solace:** Death Breath? How…inaccurate.

 **Clarisse la Rue:** O.o

 **Percy Jackson:** O.o

 **Annabeth Chase:** O.o

 **Frank Zhang:** O.o

 **Will Solace:** What? Oh! Stupid autocorrect…

 **Leo Valdez:** Sure, blame the autocorrect.

* * *

 

 **Nico di Angelo** : Damn it!

 **Lou Ellen:** What?

 **Thalia Grace:** For some reason the other hunters seem to have it in their heads that Nico likes me.

 **Nico di Angelo:** I had about thirty arrows fired at me!

 **Thalia Grace:** If Lady Artemis wasn’t aware that it isn’t true because of her brother gossiping…well, that’s better left unsaid.

 **Cesile:** Apollo is a gossip?

 **Nico di Angelo:** Yeah. Usually it’s annoying, but this time…

 **Thalia Grace:** The others still didn’t quite believe it at first. It took Nico screaming at them that he is not, has never been, and will never be attracted to a girl for them to get it.

 **Will Solace:** What did they do then?

 **Thalia Grace:** They adopted him. Be careful, we hunters get rather protective.

* * *

 **Nico di Angelo** is watching Soul Eater.

 **Chris Rodriguez:** Sweet! Which episode are you on?

 **Percy Jackson:** What’s Soul Eater?

 **Clarisse la Rue:** It’s an anime series.

 **Hazel Levesque:** Anime?

 **Nico di Angelo:** Japanese animated series. Apparently people get mad when others call them cartoons. I’m on episode thirty.

 **Chris Rodriguez:** Who is your favorite character?

 **Nico di Angelo:** Death the Kid. You had to ask?

 **Chris Rodriguez:** Yeah, I guess that should’ve been obvious.

 **Will Solace:** What’s it about?

 **Chris Rodriguez:** People who can turn into weapons, people who use those weapons, witches, death gods, demons…

* * *

**PM from Nico di Angelo to Will Solace**

**Nico di Angelo:** Come watch with me, we’ll start at the beginning.

 **Will Solace:** Sure! I’ll bring snacks. :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review! :D


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Looks in the mirror and pouts*
> 
> Yup, still not Rick Riordan. 
> 
> Damn.
> 
> (Enjoy!)

**Percy Jackson:** Don’t do meth, do math. It’ll fuck you up twice as much.

* * *

 

 **(Random Person):** Gay guys make me puke.

 **Apollo:** Don’t deep throat so far, then.

^12,874 people like this

* * *

 

 **Clovis:** But guys, what if sleeping is our natural state, and we only wake up to gather more information for our dreams?

 **Clarisse la Rue:** Stop that.

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** Do you ever wonder about how an author would describe you in a novel? Not only your appearance but the way you talk and laugh and hold yourself and all the expressions on your face?

 **Nico di Angelo:** “…and then there’s this sass-hole”

* * *

 

 **Clarisse la Rue:** Do you ever have those moments where even if you’re not romantically involved with someone, you see someone else start talking to them and you just kind of want to kick and throw things at them because ‘Fuck you, that’s my person, get your own.’

 **Nico di Angelo:** Yes.

 **Will Solace:** This explains so much.

* * *

 

(On Jason’s Facebook page)

 **Percy Jackson:** You know what, bro?

 **Jason Grace:** What?

 **Percy Jackson:** If I were a car, I’d spend all 9 lives with you.

 **Jason Grace:** *clutches heart* … _bro._

 **Nico di Angelo:** *suspicious* Are you two _sure_ I’m the only gay one here?

^Annabeth Chase and Piper McLean like this

 **Will Solace:** Good question. But, you know, even if they’re not, you’re still not alone.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Yeah, yeah, you’ve been saying that for weeks. I get it.

 **Piper McLean:** Nico. That’s not what he meant. Reread the conversation.

 **Nico di Angelo:** …Oh.

 **Will Solace:** You are so dense.

^24 people like this

* * *

 

 **Leo Valdez:** Are Medusa’s leg hairs tiny snakes?

 **Percy Jackson:** Now we’re asking the real questions.

* * *

 

 **Clarisse la Rue:** I only have 4 moods: fuck this, fuck that, fuck me, and fuck you.

 **Leo Valdez:** Let’s not forget: fuck yeah, fuck no, fuck my life, and fuck everything.

 **Jason Grace:** and don’t forget the inevitable: fuck it.

 **Percy Jackson:** and for those who have just given up: fuck.

 **Connor Stoll:** This is beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review! :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I think I'll just not bother with more disclaimers. Pretty obvious I'm not Uncle Rick.
> 
> Enjoy! :)

**Annabeth Jackson** is now married to **Percy Jackson**

**2,840 people like this**

**Piper McLean:** Congratulations again! How’s your honeymoon going?

 **Thalia Grace:** Please don’t give us details. I’M BEGGING YOU!

**1948 people like this**

**Annabeth Jackson:** We’re doing well, having fun. Is that vague enough, Thalia? ;)

 **Clarisse la Rue:** There is no such thing as ‘vague enough’ when it comes to you and Sea Spawn.

**363,018 people like this**

* * *

 

 **Jason Grace** posted a video _Nico di Angelo: Ranting in Italian_

**5,952 people like this (23 people shared this video)**

**Will Solace:** Oh gods… (Insert drooling here)

 **Percy Jackson:** Hey Nico di Angelo, it looks like Will likes your accent.

 **Will Solace:** Fuck off, Perseus.

 **Clarisse la Rue:** Oh, no nickname. Shit’s about to get real.

**286 people like this**

**Nico di Angelo:** Will, all you have to do is ask. ;)

 **Will Solace:** Oh, the possibilities…

 **Connor Stoll:** Just go make out already, the rest of us don’t want to see this.

 **Will Solace:** Fine, we will. *leaves*

 **Drew Tanaka:** Speak for yourself, Stoll. Damn, why are all the hot ones gay?

 **Annabeth Chase:** I thought you were after Jason, Drew.

 **Piper McLean:** Oh, don’t remind her of that, let her fantasize about a _different_ guy that she has no chance with…

 **Drew Tanaka:** Bitch.

 **Thalia Grace:** Slut.

**962 people like this**

**Clarisse la Rue:** Well, it’s not the kind of shit getting real I was talking about, but this is good too.

 **Connor Stoll:** I’ll bet ten drachma on Thalia. Any takers?

 **Leo Valdez:** Dude, no one is dumb enough to take that bet.

**219 people like this**

* * *

**Gleeson Hedge** posted a video _Chuck Punching His First Monster @ 3 years old_

 **Nico di Angelo:** Well, he’s certainly living up to his namesake, isn’t he?

 **Chris Rodriguez:** You know Chuck Norris?

 **Nico di Angelo:** Why is everyone always surprised when I get pop culture references? Seriously!

 **Clarisse la Rue:** Ignoring you two, GO CHUCK!

**Gleeson Hedge, Nico di Angelo, and Mellie Hedge like this**

**Leo Valdez:** With you as his godmother and Coach as his dad, I didn’t expect anything less.

 **Mellie Hedge:** His godfather isn’t the most even-tempered of people, either.

**Gleeson Hedge likes this**

**Leo Valdez:** Well, who is his godfather?

 **Gleeson Hedge:** Ghost Boy, of course.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Wait…what? Since when?

 **Mellie Hedge:** Since Chuck was born…didn’t Gleeson ask you?

 **Nico di Angelo:** He never said a word…

 **Gleeson Hedge:** I don’t get what the big deal is.

 **Nico di Angelo:** The _big deal_ is that you never told me I was the godfather to your kid! You didn’t think it might be a good idea to mention that?!?!?!?!?!

 **Mellie Hedge:** Don’t worry, I’ll deal with him. Anyway…do you accept the title?

 **Leo Valdez:** *turns puppy eyes towards Nico as he watches the tennis match*

 **Nico di Angelo:** Of course. Though I’ll have to spoil him for a while to make up for not knowing in the first place.

 **Will Solace:** Aw. So cute.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Shut it, Will.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review! :D


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy! :)

**Nico di Angelo** posted on **Travis Stoll** ’s wall

 **Nico di Angelo:** I hope you have your affairs in order.

 **Travis Stoll:** Affairs? I’m not cheating on Katie!

 **Katie Gardner:** You’d better not be…

**Thalia Grace likes this**

**Travis Stoll:** I’m not! I swear on the Styx!

 **Connor Stoll:** Um…I think he meant ‘affairs’ as in last will and testament…it was a death threat.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Exactly; nice to know that one of you has a brain. Regardless, I’m coming after you, too.

 **Katie Gardner:** What did they do this time?

 **Nico di Angelo:** …Let’s just say my hair isn’t completely black anymore.

* * *

 

 **Hazel Levesque** has posted a picture on **Nico di Angelo** ’s wall

 **Piper McLean:** At least the colors suit you…

 **Jason Grace:** Yeah, at least they didn’t use pink or something.

 **Nico di Angelo:** If they had I’d have turned them over to the Furies. Alecto already hates demigods, so I’m sure she’d have fun.

 **Percy Jackson:** No kidding. I never would have guessed.

**925 people like this**

* * *

**Nico di Angelo** has changed his profile picture

 **Nico di Angelo:** What the fuck? No I didn’t!

 **Nico di Angelo:** …

 **Nico di Angelo:** LEO!!!!!!!!!

 **Leo Valdez:** What? The gold and silver streaks suit you.

**260 people like this**

**Nico di Angelo:** I can practically _feel_ you smirking.

 **Calypso Ogygia:** Nice to know I’m not the only one.

 **Leo Valdez:** Hey! I happen to have a very manly smirk, thank you very much.

 **Calypso Ogygia:** Oh course, dear.

**528 people like this**

**Piper McLean:** He just turned as red as a tomato and started stuttering…I would recommend using more terms of endearment, preferably in very public places.

**9,257 people like this**

**Calypso Ogygia:** I’ll keep that in mind. :)

 **Nico di Angelo:** Have fun with that, and make sure you have a camcorder handy. Leo-if I ever catch you hacking into any of my accounts (or laptop, or anything else)…well, I’ll leave that to your imagination.

 **Leo Valdez:** Schist…

 **Demeter:** Language, boy!

* * *

 

**PM between Nico di Angelo and Will Solace**

**Will Solace:** Oh, don’t be too hard on them, it looks good on you.

 **Nico di Angelo:** And the fact that one of the colors is gold and you’re father’s domain includes the sun has nothing to do with it.

 **Will Solace:** Um…well…

 **Nico di Angelo:** Don’t hurt yourself. I was already planning on leaving it in. I’m still going to get revenge, though. I’ll find a way to dye _their_ hair pink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review! :D


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure a few of these will be recognized. When looking for ideas, see what's actually floating around Facebook! If these are old, it's because I wrote this a couple years ago. :P
> 
> Enjoy! :)

**Leo Valdez:** is it data or data?

 **Jason Grace:** is it route or route?

 **Percy Jackson:** is it caramel or caramel?

 **Frank Zhang:** is it either or either?

 **Piper McLean:** is it read or read?

 **Annabeth Chase:** I hate all of you so much right now.

 **Connor Stoll:** FUCK ENGLISH!

 **Leo Valdez:** You don’t seem content with this content.

^6 people liked this

* * *

 

 **Travis Stoll:** Can you use the term, “I shit you not” in an English essay or is that unprofessional?

 **Percy Jackson:** nonononono, never use “I” statements in formal essays (trust me, my stepdad is an English teacher)

 **Travis Stoll:** One shits you not?

 **Leo Valdez:** Also acceptable: This author shits you not.

 **Percy Jackson:** It’s best to avoid the “general you.” “One would not be considered shitted,” is probably the best way I could think to word it formally.

 **Annabeth Chase:** oh my gods

* * *

 **Percy Jackson:** _knowledge_ is knowing that tomato is a fruit

 **Jason Grace:** _wisdom_ is not putting it in a fruit salad.

 **Connor Stoll:** That was deep.

 **Leo Valdez:** _philosophy_ is wondering if that means ketchup is a smoothie

 **Travis Stoll:** That was deeper.

 **Clarisse la Rue:** _common sense_ is knowing that ketchup isn’t a damn smoothie, dumbasses.

^Annabeth Chase, Piper McLean, Calypso Ogygia, and Katie Gardner like this.

* * *

 

 **Will Solace:** voting against gay marriage is like ordering a piece of cake at a restaurant and having a complete stranger be like “waiter, cancel that cake.”

^Jason Grace likes this

 **Piper McLean:** “Waiter, cancel that cake it’s ruining my cake and I don’t know how to explain it to my children.”

 **Rachel Elizabeth Dare:** “My diet book says I can’t have so throw that guy’s cake away too.”

 **Leo Valdez:** Will, is there something you’d like to announce to the class?

 **Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano:** Yes, Solace, do tell. One moment, I need to go sharpen my sword…

^Jason Grace, Hazel Levesque, and Frank Zhang like this

 **Nico di Angelo:** Reyna, you’re taking this way too seriously. We’re _fifteen._

 **Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano:** All the more reason.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Oh gods…

 **Percy Jackson:** Wait, what? Did I miss something?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review! :D


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy! :)

**Nico di Angelo:** _Why did we as a society collectively decide that we have to be productive before 9 am? We could have avoided this…it didn’t have to be like this._

^94 people like this

 **Annabeth Chase:** Because it was decided before electricity was invented, meaning natural light was the only thing they had, and people back then weren’t able to work during the night.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Ugh. You and your ‘reasons.’

^15 people like this

 **Will Solace:** I couldn’t sleep in even if I wanted to. #Thanksdad

 **Leo Valdez:** Dude, this isn’t tumblr. No hashtags allowed.

^9 people like this

* * *

 

 **Travis Stoll:** _Let’s just be clear—if you spend the time baking a cake/cookies/brownies, you can eat as many of them as you want and the calories don’t count. You made those calories. You’re their god._

**Connor Stoll:** _Disclaimer—this does not apply to children you have made._

**Percy Jackson:** _Looking at you, gramps._

^Poseidon likes this

* * *

 

**Leo Valdez:** _Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak, like “Look at this flower. This flower is taller than I am. This flower is winning and I’m losing.”_

**Katie Gardner:** Wow. You put way too much thought into this.

 **Connor Stoll:** Guess I shouldn’t bring up trees, then.

^Travis Stoll likes this

 **Travis Stoll:** Oops too late.

^Connor Stoll likes this

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** _Dear Necromancers_ (cough* Nico di Angelo* cough), _why would you bother summoning human corpses when dinosaurs are an option?_

**Nico di Angelo:** _There is an entire movie series dedicated to explaining why we do not reanimate dinosaurs._

^Annabeth Chase likes this

 **Leo Valdez:** _Are you suggesting necromancers were behind Jurassic Park?_

 **Connor Stoll:** Hey wait a minute…hey,  Frank Zhang!

^Travis Stoll, Leo Valdez, and Percy Jackson like this

 **Frank Zhang:** No.

^the rest of the world likes this

* * *

 

 **Nico di Angelo:** _If someone points at your black clothes and asks you whose funeral it is, a look around the room and a casual “I haven’t decided yet’ is always a good response._

 **Will Solace:** I can’t take you anywhere, can I?

* * *

 

 **Leo Valdez:** Annabeth Chase _What do you call a dictionary on drugs?_

**Annabeth Chase:** _If you say addictionary I swear to the gods I will cut you._

**Leo Valdez:** _I was going to say ‘high definition’ but yours is better._ (Also, violent much?)

 **Annabeth Chase:** *face-palm*

* * *

 

 **Drew Tanaka:** _What if hot chocolate just wants to be called beautiful chocolate?_

 **Piper McLean:** All chocolate is beautiful chocolate.

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** _How do I become a jellyfish?_

**Clarisse la Rue:** _Jellyfish have no brains. You’re already pretty close._


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next I don't actually think I'd ever posted at all in the original, if the 'unposted' in the file name is anything to go buy. 
> 
> Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy! :)

**Annabeth Chase:** “People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.” ~Isaac Asimov

^Athena and Apollo like this

(AN: Apollo is also the god of knowledge, after all.)

* * *

 

 **Jason Grace:** Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success.” ~Henry Ford

 **Percy Jackson:** and winning together is…survival? Prevention of world domination/destruction?

 **Jason Grace:** …yeah, let’s go with that.

* * *

 

 **Clarisse la Rue:** A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is a seasoned veteran.

 **Will Solace:** Please don’t say that around Harley, he doesn’t need any more inspiration. The infirmary is crowded enough as it is.

 **Clarisse la Rue:** …Noted.

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** Demigod Problem #15: that moment when you spell a word so wrong that even autocorrect is like, I’ve got nothing man!

^80 people like this

* * *

 

 **Reyna Ramirez-Arellano:** Old people at weddings always look at me and say “you’re next.’ So, I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

 **Nico di Angelo:** And if they keep at it, you’ll make sure of it.

 **Reyna Ramirez-Arellano:** Ah, a kindred spirit.

 **Nico di Angelo** Partly. No one’s done that to me at a wedding yet; too young. Give me a few years.

 **Percy Jackson:** *snickers* I’ll keep this in mind.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Careful, Perseus. We wouldn’t want to make Annabeth a widow at such a young age, now would we?

^Reyna Ramirez-Arellano and Annabeth Chase like this

* * *

 

 **Apollo:** The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar.

 **Will Solace:** Okay…

 **Apollo:** It was tense.

* * *

 

 **Rachel Elizabeth Dare:** The “Earth” without “art” is just “Eh.”

^Minerva likes this

 **Rachel Elizabeth Dare:** Lady Minerva, you have a Facebook account, too?

 **Minerva:** *twitches*

 **Annabeth Chase:** Let’s not start this again. Are you okay, mother?

 **Athena:** I suppose.

* * *

 **Clovis:** Never give up on your dreams: keep sleeping.

 **Percy Jackson:** I wish I could sleep…but then my brain kicks in and, well, basically: one sheep, two sheep, cow, turtle, duck, Ol’ McDonald had a farm. ~ Hey, Macarena! ~

 **Clovis:** Yeah, I’m just gonna… Zzzzzzzzz…..

* * *

 

 **Jason Grace:** Thanks wind, you totally raped my hair.

 **Aeolus:** …You are welcome?

* * *

 

 **Nico di Angelo:** To all you idiots on here reposting stupid stories telling you if you don’t repost you’re going to die because of some random vengeful ghost or whatnot, know this: I have NEVER met a ghost that died because they didn’t repost that message on their friends’ wall.

 **Lou Ellen:** Well, obviously. The requirement is five—if they posted ten then they’d have been safe. :P

 **Nico di Angelo:** *face-palm*

* * *

 

 **(Random Person):** Don’t steal. The government hates competition.

 **Travis Stoll:** Challenge accepted. Hey,  Connor Stoll! We’re going to need 3 packs of rubber bands, a tube of itch cream, and a bag of catnip…

 **Connor Stoll:** On it!

* * *

 

 **Chiron:** To be old and wise, you must first have to be young and stupid.

 **Athena:** *coughs pointedly*

 **Chiron:** Or be born fully grown. That works, too.

* * *

 

 **Piper McLean:** Don’t break anybody’s heart; they only have one.

 **Gleeson Hedge:** Break their bones, they have 206.

^Clarisse la Rue likes this

 **Piper McLean:** …I can accept that. Given the situation calls for it, at least.

 **Gleeson Hedge:** Good girl. I taught you well.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this is the last chapter that I'd written back then, so for now this is it. Who knows, maybe I'll write more one day if I get struck with inspiration?
> 
> Enjoy! :D

**Hermes:** My family is temperamental. Half temper, half mental.

 **Percy Jackson:** Wish someone had told me that six years ago.

 **Annabeth Chase:** We did. You ignored our (many) warnings.

^195 people like this.

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life.

 **Annabeth Chase:** Does that mean you’re cheating on me? I’m rather certain I’m not the only one you annoy.

^Everyone likes this

* * *

 

 **Lou Ellen:** Be yourself, everyone else is ~~already taken~~ a twat.

* * *

 

 **Dionysus:** The secret to enjoying a good wine: Step 1—open the bottle to allow it to breathe. Step 2—If it does not look like it’s breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth.

* * *

 

(On Annabeth’s page)

 **Percy Jackson:** You are a smart cookie.

 **Connor Stoll:** A wise chocolate cake.

 **Travis Stoll:** A brilliant pancake.

 **Leo Valdez:** *hums* One of these things is not like the others…

 **Annabeth Chase:** Ow…I just rolled my eyes so hard I think I saw my brain.

 **Athena:** That’s impossible, dear.

 **Annabeth Chase:** I know; that’s the worst part.

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** I’m not always rude and sarcastic. Sometimes I’m asleep.

 **Clovis:** Sometimes you’re rude and sarcastic _while_ asleep.

 **Percy Jackson:** Oh, go back to sleep already. If people would stop stalking my dreams…

 **Clovis:** Well excuse me for trying to figure out just how your messed up brain works. :P

^63 people like this

 **Grover Underwood:** Good luck with that.

 **Percy Jackson:** Traitor!

* * *

 

 **Grover Underwood:** Why is there a show called ‘When Animals Attack?’ It should be called ‘When STUPID people go near dangerous animals.’

^19 people like this

* * *

 

 **Will Solace:** I don’t think I could ever stab someone. I mean, let’s be honest. I can barely get the straw in a Capri Sun.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Eh, stabbing people is my job anyway.

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** Personally I’m a fan of just ignoring a problem until it eventually goes away.

 **Nico di Angelo:** Hence why it took you so long to make a decision about getting the Achilles Curse.

 **Percy Jackson:** Well, it _is_ a curse…

* * *

 

 **Athena:** I worry that Facebook is killing meaningful communication…

 **Apollo:** Like

 **Hermes:** Share

 **Poseidon:** Poke

 **Athena:** You all disgust me.

^Apollo, Hermes, and Poseidon like this

 **Poseidon:** Feeling’s mutual, Owl Head!

 **Athena:** Oh, you know the meaning of the word ‘mutual?’ Color me impressed.

^Artemis likes this

* * *

 

 **Percy Jackson:** When something goes wrong in your life just yell “Plot twist!” and move on.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it!
> 
> Also, feel free to check out [My Store](https://www.etsy.com/shop/RayvnashesButtons)!


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